Why didn't you LIKE the masterpiece that I commissioned from Brian Van? http://brianvan.tumblr.com/post/355080123/a-visit-from-an-old-friend-requested-by-bakes
whoa! Missed it. I’m ashamed to admit that I frequently don’t actually read all that comes through the dashboard, due to my unfortunate employment situation (of being employed). Stellar work though. I miss that ubiquitous gall.
I'm having an increasingly hard time reconciling my abiding interest in technology and media, my genuine affection for stimulating intellectual and social debate, and my growing conviction that everyone on the internet should be herded out of town and driven off a cliff.
This includes people who share the last opinion. Maybe even especially them. I’ll be first over the edge.
Registered a few domains on Friday. Searched a few more. Within 90 seconds I got an email acknowledging the purchased domains, including a discount code for my next purchase. Within 20 minutes I got an email noting some of the domains I’d searched but not bought, including another discount code to insure I didn’t let those unbought domains “get away.” Two hours later I was browsing another website and a Register.com banner ad came up; sensing a browser cookie from my login at Register.com, the banner reminded me of the domains I’d searched but not bought, again imploring me to reconsider not buying them. And today, a Register.com customer service rep called me at work to ask, again, if maybe I’d like to buy some of those domains? This is real flattering and all, but please, Register.com, I’m a happily married man and just not really looking to fool around with egolista.com right now, okay?
Qualification of authority, then: Here’s a better way to do something that uses less time and less effort than the way you used to do it, even though the way you do it probably is the best way for you to do it, because, let’s face it, we all have our own particular way of going about things that’s best suited to us. But since I’m someone from the internet, I’m going to assume your way is stupid until you do it my way, because I’m from the internet, smart, and full of good ideas. You pedestrian troglodyte.
Slightly related — people who I’m Facebook “friends” with asking me to also become a “fan” of them, or rather, a fan of their branded personality careerist shibboleth entity. Presumably my friendship just isn’t enough anymore.
BlackBook is seeking an enthusiastic Sales Coordinator to join their team and report directly to the Associate Publisher.
This position is dynamic and challenging and will allow the right individual to broaden their skill set and knowledge base. It requires someone that has a passion for Media and a willingness to learn cross-platform, integrated marketing. You will be exposed to all aspects of a rapidly growing Media company including Sales, Marketing, PR, and Events. The principle responsibility of the Sales Coordinator is to take initiative in helping to create an organized and efficient sales operation.
RESPONSIBILITIES INCLUDE (but are not limited to the following): • Trafficking, reporting, and optimizing online and mobile campaigns. • Administrative and executive support for the Sales department. • Coordinating and assembling all sales and marketing materials. • Preparing RFPs (Request For Proposal), proposals, client meetings, mailings, and expense reports. • Interfacing with clients and vendors via phone, email and in-person. • Supporting client events. • Maintenance of competitive tracking, complimentary mailing list, and bulk mailings. • Mobile, Online and Print ad trafficking with extensive Microsoft Excel usage. • Liaison between the Sales team and all other departments including Production, Development, Edit and Accounting. • Occasional local travel and client entertainment coordination. • Light office maintenance and upkeep.
REQUIREMENTS: • BA or higher • Ideal candidate will have 1-2 years of administrative, sales and/or marketing experience. Mobile/Online/Print background a plus. • Proven ability to multi-task and work under intense deadline pressure in a fast-paced environment. • Experience trafficking online ads in DART • Exceptional attention to detail and organizational skills. • Strong analytical, creative-thinking and problem-solving skills. • Energetic self-starter and team player. • High level of proficiency in Outlook, Excel, PowerPoint and Word.
About Our Company BlackBook (www.bbook.com) is the insider’s guide to style and culture. We deliver our City Guides through mobile applications, BBook.com, pocket-sized books & a visually-arresting monthly magazine. The BlackBook Guides are the ultimate curated source for finding the best restaurants, bars & clubs, hotels, shopping and more in major U.S. and international cities. Check us out and get inside at BBook.com or download the BlackBook Guides iPhone app.
Contact Bridgette Bek, please include cover letter and resume Email Address firstname.lastname@example.org (please place Sales Coordinator in subject line)
“THIS IS MAGIC. YOU PUT ON THIS HELMET AND NOBODY, BUT NOBODY CAN TELL WHO YOU ARE. BUT YOU CAN SEE EVERYBODY AND EVERYTHING! THIS SENSATIONAL DISCOVERY IS AS NEW AS THE HYDROGEN BOMB! AS EXCITING AS A RIDE THROUGH SPACE. MAKES YOU A SUPER SPACE CADET. BE FIRST IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD. DON’T LET ANYONE BEAT YOU. YOU BE THE FIRST. FOOL YOUR FRIENDS. PUT THIS ON, NOBODY CAN RECOGNIZE YOU - YET YOU SEE EVERYBODY ELSE! BOYS, GIRLS, MEN AND WOMEN - AND YOU SEE WHAT THEY ARE DOING! BE ENVIED BY EVERYONE - YOU WILL HAVE FUN! YOU WILL BE THE HERO OF YOUR TOWN.”—
The retro ad is funny but the copy that comes with — such outrageous lies — just seems so awful and sad somehow, like it’s going for the insecurity jugular of every sad little nerd-child who will not ever be the hero of their town. Perfect fodder for Jimmy Corrigan. Step-by-step side strip reads 1. PUT IT ON … 2. NOW - YOU SEE PEOPLE - THEY CAN’T SEE YOU! 3. EVERYBODY AMAZED! More like, 3. MOM SMILES INDULGENTLY, TELLS YOU TO GO PLAY OUTSIDE. NEIGHBOR KIDS ATTACK YOU ON SIGHT PER USUAL. INVISIBLE HELMET CRUSHED, THROWN ON ROOF. WEEP.