REFROG = FREE FROG
Ever since he appeared at the Tumblr office — smuggled in with a shipment of climatologically inappropriate cacti — Refrog has stolen the hearts and minds of everyone who doesn’t just despise him because they are unjust and terrible. Due to an increased human population in the local office habitat, Refrog needs a new non-office home where he’s not taking up precious desk space.
As you can see from his bright golden eyes and vibrant mucousoid sheen, Refrog has made quite a recovery from his pallid, clammy debut. Popularly believed to be a Cuban tree frog, he is the definition of low maintenance, running you perhaps a buck fitty per week in crickets and requiring little else in terms of care. The successful adopter will receive not only Refrog himself but also his terrarium, which is pre-kitted out with cover, fake plants, real moss, light, heaters, humidifier, temp and humidity gauges, and accursed Mayan totem head for relaxation. Obviously the new parent(s) need(s) to be in New York and willing to fetch him from the Tumblr office north of Union Square; because I recognize times are tough, I’ll throw in a $20 Metrocard for the trip here and back to wherever you live, and for the first few cricket runs.
If you’d like to adopt Refrog, just drop a line in my askbox describing yourself and why you should be his new patron. All applicants considered!